Sextortion: how it starts and what to do if it happens to you

Sextortion is blackmail using intimate images or videos. It has become one of the most common forms of online abuse in India, and it can happen to anyone, men and women, young and old. If it is happening to you right now, the most important thing to know is this: you are not alone, it is not your fault, and paying almost never makes it stop.

How it usually starts

The pattern is depressingly familiar:

A friendly, attractive stranger starts chatting, often on a social or dating app, sometimes after a random chat.
The conversation turns flirty quickly. They move you to a video-call app, or send “their” intimate photos first to build trust.
You are persuaded to undress on a video call or send an intimate photo. The call may be recorded, or the other person was a pre-recorded video all along.
Minutes later, the tone changes. They send you the recording along with screenshots of your friends and family lists, and demand money or they will share it.

Some versions skip the images altogether: the scammer simply claims to have a recording, or edits your face onto someone else’s body.

If it is happening to you

Stop all contact. Don’t negotiate, don’t explain, don’t beg. Every reply tells them you are worth pursuing.
Don’t pay. Payment is usually followed by a bigger demand. Blackmailers target people who pay.
Don’t delete the evidence yet. Take screenshots of the chats, their profile, usernames, phone numbers, UPI IDs and any payment details. You may need them for a complaint.
Report it. Call 1930 or file a complaint at cybercrime.gov.in. You can also report the account to the platform where it happened.
Lock down your accounts. Make your social media private, hide your friends and followers lists, and turn on two-factor authentication.
Tell someone you trust. Blackmail feeds on shame and isolation. A friend, sibling or counsellor can help you think clearly.

If you are feeling overwhelmed or hopeless, please talk to someone now. Tele-MANAS (14416) offers free, confidential support 24 hours a day in many Indian languages. In an emergency, call 112.

Getting images taken down

If an intimate image of you (as an adult) has been shared or you fear it will be, StopNCII.org can help. It creates a digital fingerprint of the image on your own device, without uploading the image itself, and participating platforms use that fingerprint to detect and block copies.

If the person in the image is under 18, report it immediately at cybercrime.gov.in. This is a serious crime, and the authorities treat it as one.

How to protect yourself

Never undress or do anything intimate on a video call with someone you haven’t met in person. Assume every call can be recorded.
Be wary of fast intimacy. A stranger who turns sexual within minutes, or who pushes you to switch apps, is following a script.
Keep your friend lists private. Blackmailers use them to threaten you.
Don’t share personal details such as your full name, workplace or social media handles with people you’ve just met online.

How Chatavi is designed to help

Chatavi is text-only: there are no photos, videos or video calls, so there is nothing for anyone to record. Phone numbers, email addresses, UPI IDs and links are blocked automatically, and pushing someone to move to another app is against the rules, which makes it much harder for anyone to pull you somewhere else. Unwanted sexual messages break our Community Guidelines. Reporting someone ends the chat, and the two of you are never matched again.

For more everyday safety habits, read how to stay safe while chatting anonymously.